Hey guys, it’s your favorite funny person here, and today we’re going to be talking about meal plans. Yes, I know, exciting stuff, right? But trust me, it’s going to be hilarious. I mean, have you ever tried sticking to a meal plan? It’s like trying to stick to a budget, only with food. And let’s be real, food is just way more tempting than clothes or shoes or whatever else you’re trying to save money on.
Meal Plan #1: The Healthy Meal Plan Series: 1,200 Calories - The Challenge
First up, we have the 1,200 calorie meal plan challenge. Whoever came up with this is clearly a sadist, because let’s be real, 1,200 calories is not a lot. I mean, sure, it might be fine for a small child or a bird or something, but for a grown adult with actual hunger pangs? Not so much.
But hey, we’re all about challenges here, so let’s give it a try. For breakfast, we have some toast and peanut butter. Okay, not bad. For lunch, a tiny salad with some grilled chicken. Alright, that’s still doable. But then comes dinner, and we’re supposed to have fish and vegetables. Like, just fish and vegetables. No pasta, no rice, no nothing. I don’t know about you guys, but that sounds pretty depressing to me.
Meal Plan #2: 1200-Calorie Meal Plan
Next up, we have another 1,200 calorie meal plan. Seriously, what’s with this obsession with 1,200 calories? Are they trying to kill us? Anyway, this one seems a little more doable. We have some eggs and veggies for breakfast, a turkey and cheese wrap for lunch, and some baked chicken and quinoa for dinner. Okay, that’s not bad. But then we’re supposed to have a snack of celery and almond butter. I mean, I like almond butter as much as the next person, but celery? Come on.
Meal Plan #3: Printable 1300 Calorie Meal Plan Uk
Alright, let’s bump up the calories a little bit with this 1,300 calorie meal plan. We have some oatmeal and berries for breakfast, a chicken and avocado wrap for lunch, and some spaghetti bolognese for dinner. Hey, that’s actually starting to sound pretty good. But then we have a snack of carrots and hummus. I mean, I’m all for healthy snacks, but come on. Can we get some chips and guac up in here?
Meal Plan #4: Meal plan for 21 fix diet
Okay, now we’re onto the 21 day fix meal plan, and things are starting to get a little more interesting. This meal plan is all about portion control, which is great, because let’s be real, I have no self-control when it comes to food. For breakfast, we have some scrambled eggs and turkey bacon (yum), for lunch, some meatballs with zucchini noodles (interesting), and for dinner, some baked tilapia with roasted veggies (delicious). But then we’re supposed to have a snack of Greek yogurt with some berries. I mean, that’s fine, but I’m still dreaming of those chips and guac.
Meal Plan #5: Paleo Diet 7 Day 1300 Calories a Day Meal Plan
Last but not least, we have the paleo diet meal plan. Now, I have to admit, I’m a little skeptical of the whole paleo thing. I mean, our ancestors didn’t have access to almond milk and chia seeds, did they? Anyway, for breakfast, we have some scrambled eggs with some veggies (okay), for lunch, a tuna salad with some avocado (not bad), and for dinner, some beef stir-fry with some broccoli (yum). But then we’re supposed to have a snack of some almonds and an apple. I mean, I like almonds and apples as much as the next person, but can we please get some chips and guac up in here?
Alright guys, there you have it, 5 different meal plans for you to try. Will any of them actually help you lose weight? Who knows. But hey, at least you’ll be entertained while you try.
